Necessary Voodoo

We are the Earth intruders
Muddy with twigs and branches
Marching
March

The scene on my drive to work:
Listening to Beatles channel still
I should have known better
You're gonna say you love me too
Seems a bit strong-arm
Thought about AOC and started to cry because at such a young age she has this much poise and is doing it (she has what it takes to do it! --inside joke to myself-way inside-deep!)
Thought about an interview with Sean Lennon talking about his memories of his dad
Pretended to meet Sean Lennon and tell him about the part of the interview I liked--his dad would always turn off the television when commercials would come on and he would always turn it back on at the right time.  Also, the part with the little sweet fishes for snacks instead of candy.
Then I said to Sean that my son is older than you were when...and I couldn't say it, I just started crying and Sean didn't want me to cry and grabbed my arms gently and said here, let's find my mom.  And then I saw Yoko Ono and said Oh Yoko and just started sobbing in her arms....Well, I was crying in my car.


We are the Earth intruders
We are the sharpshooters
Flock of parachuters
Necessary VoooOOOdoo

We are the Earth intruders
Muddy with twigs and branches
Marching
March
March
March
March

day 2-deactivated

We are done. :(  It's a good thing, I know, but I can't help feeling a bit sad about it.  She asked to wurse about 1-2 hours before we normally wake up and I almost gave in because she asked so sweetly, but I thought it was closer to wake up time and said no.  She threw a little fit that made me feel not so bad about saying no.  She just turned her back towards me in disgust. :)
I can feel a spark of freedom, but right now I guess I need to mourn a little.  It's funny because I have been wanting this for the most part.  Especially since my anxiety or hormones or both have been uncontrollable and uncomfortable.  I keep thinking that maybe nursing is causing this feeling.  I guess we shall see, because it doesn't seem to be the copper IUD.
I keep trying to find relief in tinctures and tea, but I think I'm going nowhere with them.  Right now I am trying Ashwagandha, Reishi and Kava tea.  Oh and sage to dry up my milk. 

Crying over dried milk

What am I?
An old woman now?
No more babies, no more nursing
The factory is closed.
I'm crying over dried milk
because
just because
I'm crying over dried milk
cuz those days are done
Crying cuz the mid-life crisis has just begun
I can hold you and rock you, hold you and rock you
until you leave my nest
For now I will cry over my deactivated breasts.

It's time to pacify the pacifiers
Retire what made us all tired

Crying over dried milk
until my freedom soaks in