World Leader Pretend

Reach out for me and hold me tight
Hold that memory
Let my machine talk to me, let my machine talk to me
Let it say Covfefe


NPR report
El Lobo's job to secure a safe entry into the United States is getting less dependable.  He may have to open up a little store or sell cars.  For now he must charge more, $4800, to paddle his clients across the Rio Grande on inner tubes and scale a metal fence in Brownsville, TX.
 
I can't spend near that much for a vacation!

El Lobo shows the interviewer his friction burns on his inner arms that he got when he shimmied up an iron pole and slid down the other side to tie a rope to haul over his clients.
El Lobo says we can spend the exorbitant amount of US tax dollars to build a wall, "But we'll just climb over it!"

A union official of the National Boarder Control Council response:

"I would say the guy's probably a little full of himself," he says of El Lobo. "I mean I think that a wall is a barrier for him.  Does it stop him?  No.  Does it slow him down?  Yes, it does.  If there was no wall, he wouldn't have any bruises and he'd get his traffic across that much easier."

I need Fred Armisten and Bill Hader to create something out of this.  People are paying for the worst vacation ever.  El Lobo says a wall will not deter him nor or his clients.  US Boarder control official says the wall will not work, but dude will get bruises, so win.

For now, without the wall, there is a dramatic decline in illegal border crossing.  I guess a mix of extra border patrol and Trump not wanting them is enough to pass on El Lobo.  I don't want the fucking wall, I'm for legalizing and regulating drugs and aligning with our southern neighbor so that the people who don't really want to leave don't pay for a shitty vacation.

Driver 8 take a break

Stuff I actually say while driving:
"Dude, I don't like inconsistent people.  You either drive fast or you don't, motherfucker."

That could be a line in Fast and the Furious 8, Forever Furious.  Ridiculous.  If I liked hashtags I would probably have to file this under hashtag roadrage?

I am devising a reality show about driving.  It will help people with road rage, remind drivers the rules of the road and teach or reteach drivers the best way to operate their vehicle.  So reality clients would be bad drivers or those notorious for road rage.  Of course there would be minor cases mixed in.  Advisers will be impeccable drivers, former driving instructors and psychologists.  I think it would be good for the public in general to learn/relearn driver etiquette or at least to get a conversation going.

Since I'm randomly on the subject, I am also trying to work out little messages that drivers can impart to one another.  Because, sometimes you really are sorry.  I keep picturing a round head light style sign that says "Sorry" or "Excuse Me" that you can read when you push a button to light up the sign.  I guess that's the the 70s version. :)  I'm sure the better/more technologically advanced way would be for each car to basically talk to each other.  Maybe there would still be buttons inside the car that say "My fault" or "After you".

Might as well go for the fourfecta, my child LOVES cars.  He tries to carry all of his toy cars in his hands.  He makes an amazing car sound for his age (whatever that means).  My husband and I might watch Chasing Classic Cars or Counting Cars every once in awhile, but we are not gear heads.  Wheels are cool though, which seems to be why he's interested.  It's like he learns from Caveman up.  I hope fire is not next!  

Spin out on this: